About Doggie Doors

On behalf of my wonderful Mom, I am posting the following for her. Bromley, you see, forgot to mention this part of the Doggie Door Installation Drama.

What *not* to do to train your dog to use the doggie door! (Especially when you
have a hyper, barely 2 yr. old, 125 lb. crazy boy):

1. Bounce around the doggie door like a complete idiot to get their interest.

2. Continuing with step 1, start enthusiastically singing the praises of how
wonderful using a doggie door can be.

3. While continuing with step 2, get down on all fours and proceed to crawl
through the highly praised doggie door.

4. Still performing steps 2 and 3, be completely successful in getting your 125
lbs of muscle in plenty and pea brain boy to fly through the highly praised
doggie door, while you are still attempting to fit through it.

5. Scream at the sight of your dog happily standing outside in front of
you--which he is suddenly so proud of having accomplished--while your ankle is
smashed and feels partly embedded into the frame of the highly praised doggie
door.

6. Sit on the sofa for a week while your doofus says he's sorry and brings you
flowers.



Obviously she was talking about Bromley here, featured in the stupid picture. First of all, I am bigger than 125 lbs., and second of all, I am far too dignified to do anything so idiotic as bolt through the doggie door while Mom is being silly and trying to fit through it.

Glad we have that all cleared up.

This is how I use a doggie door, by the way:



Carefully, with calculated precision. I also stick a nose out on forehand to check the weather conditions. One can never be too cautious.